The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize