I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
We don't watch enough power rangers
My legs feel like baby dolphins
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize