I'll bet she douches with gravy.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize