Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize