who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
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