Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
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