I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
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She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
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How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
my liver is dry heaving
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
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