When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
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