You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
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I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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