it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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