What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize