She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Randomize