They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
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