You're so nebulous sometimes
just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Randomize