hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
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