Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
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All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
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I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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