It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
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