my dad came in to wish me a happy birthday and found me passed out in my underwear with the lights on and a plate of meat on the bed. i bet he was proud to have contributed to my creation in that moment.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
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I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
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i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
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