The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Randomize