Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize