not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
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I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
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This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
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