i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
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