another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
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