i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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