Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
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