Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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