If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
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