Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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