Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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