I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
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