We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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