He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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