trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
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