can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
my being single is dangerous.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize