hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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