Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
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