no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
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