and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, beer. Big fan.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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