I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
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