i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize