i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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