they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
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Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
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