Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (+44): View more from England

  Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food. http://tfl.nu/05sf
  Replies (20) Good night (3474) Bad night (660) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  she looks like luggage that fell from a plane

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (217): she looks like luggage that fell from a plane http://tfl.nu/yvwr
  Replies (5) Good night (470) Bad night (2371) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (407): I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done. http://tfl.nu/92fz
  Replies (4) Good night (2885) Bad night (544) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder. http://tfl.nu/za6c
  Replies (21) Good night (4821) Bad night (740) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (281): View more from Texas

  he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (281): he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to." http://tfl.nu/qnhd
  Replies (16) Good night (1743) Bad night (5443) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth http://tfl.nu/91m9
  Replies (16) Good night (1394) Bad night (3327)
• Favorite

  (209): View more from California

  What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (209): What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons? http://tfl.nu/8u4p
  Replies (20) Good night (3141) Bad night (983) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (603): Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night? http://tfl.nu/gcf5
  Replies (9) Good night (1562) Bad night (633) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (904): Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again. http://tfl.nu/hcx3
  Replies (1) Good night (708) Bad night (1617) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional. http://tfl.nu/t1vf
  Replies (9) Good night (2523) Bad night (455) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away. http://tfl.nu/k6q1
  Replies (13) Good night (6281) Bad night (787)
• Favorite

  (573): View more from Missouri

  Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (573): Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something http://tfl.nu/61ie
  Replies (7) Good night (610) Bad night (1101) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (901): I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off. http://tfl.nu/oaek
  Replies (6) Good night (1261) Bad night (371) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  you should be awarded for your promiscuity.

  (1-415): View more from California

  i really should.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (415): you should be awarded for your promiscuity. (1-415): i really should. http://tfl.nu/3phz
  Replies (4) Good night (787) Bad night (337) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary http://tfl.nu/znga
  Replies (8) Good night (1027) Bad night (362) Order T-Shirt

Randomize