i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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