Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize