True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize