grandma shit on top of the toilet
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
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