NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Randomize