I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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