i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
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